2. You might be a Redneck if you buy a new house and have to hire somebody to take the wheels off for you

3. You might be a Redneck if going to the bathroom at night consists of a flashlight and a jacket

4. You might be a Redneck if you go to the junk yard and come back with more than you left with

5. You might be a Redneck if you mow the lawn and find a car

6. You might be a Redneck if your wife's hair-do gets caught in ceiling fans

7. You might be a Redneck if some one asks for your I.D. and you show them your belt buckle

8. You might be a Redneck if when you see a sign that says "Say NO to crack" it reminds you to pull up your pants

9. You might be a Redneck if your aunt and your sister get in a fight and you can't lose if you bet on your cousin

10. You might be a Redneck if you have a gun rack in the back window of your car

11. You might be a Redneck if you walk your son to fifth grade every day because you two are in the same class

12. You might be a Redneck if the government begs your entire family to leave the country to lower the illiteracy rate by 12%

13. You might be a redneck if you stare at a box of Orange Juice 'cause it says "Concentrate"

14. You might be a redneck if you have to wipe off your feet before going out side

15. You might Be a Redneck if you ask for a bottle-opener for Christmas

16. You might be a redneck if your computer displays a box that says "to continue press any key" and you ask "Where's the 'any key?'

17. You might be a redneck if your greatest source of income is beer bottles at the side of the road

18. You might be a redneck if hitting an animal while driving means a new coat for a family member

19. You might be a redneck if your family tree doesn't branch off

20. You might be a redneck if you think "megabytes" means a good day fishing.

21. You might be a redneck if you've ever picked up a women in a convenience store.

22. You might be a redneck if you're familiar with Copenhagen but have never heard of Denmark.

23. You might be a redneck if you think "trash TV" is something in your backyard.

24. You might be a redneck if you think "Ross Perot" is how your cousin Ross got out of jail early.

25. You might be a redneck if you don't have a home phone.

26. You might be a redneck if you think stock tip is advice on wormin' your hogs.

27. You might be a redneck if your favorite restaurant has a gas pump in front of it.

28. You might be a redneck if stealing road signs is a family outing.

29. You might be a redneck if you think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

30. You might be a redneck if you've ever changed the numbers on your house so the police can't find you.

31. You might be a redneck if you have an above ground pool and you fish in it.

32. You might be a redneck if your bathroom deodorizer is a box of kitchen matches.